HABITS

Habits are first taught, then developed in the early formative years. Those that served continued. The difficult or adversarial were transformed, dropped or became an obstacle. Habits are programmed into you by your early programmers. (parents, immediate family, environment, etc.) Once you have decided to eliminate an unwanted habit and replace it with another, the transformation can begin.

Key words are "decide" and "replace". The brain has accepted a decision and must replace the behavior vacancy with a more useful behavior. The process is as follows: observe, decide, replace and practice. Everybody is unique and the time it takes to make the transformation is also unique to each individual and is relative to the depth and strength of the habit. Habit replacement is often associated with a timeline. Incorporating this into the practice will not likely help as you may focus on the timeline rather than the new behavior and will disconnect to your uniqueness relative to the habit.

Keep it simple and stick to the procedure. If your brain can accept non-useful information in the form of a bad habit, it can re-program a new and useful suggestion backed up with the desired behavior. What you give attention to will grow. Its the mind first directing the behavior. Observe and accept the behavior, then begin the transforming behaviors.

The steps are as follows:

1) Observe and identify the undesired behavior.

2) Decide that the behavior will change and commit to this decision.

3) Decide on a replacement behavior.

4) Practice and deliver the results that you have committed to and deserve.

This procedure will work for any habit or undesired behavior. But only until one is truly committed and makes the decision for transformation will behavior change. Success will be elusive unless true commitment is in place. And again, success builds confidence.

An example:

Procrastination in general is a common habit and a part of most lives. It becomes a problem when it is overreaching and life is out of control and necessary obligations become overwhelmed. One can "hide" in procrastination. Over thinking a problem can result in paralysis of analysis.

First step: Observe and accept. The behavior is accepted and change is necessary. Be kind to yourself and know the behavior came from some area of wanting to protect yourself. The decision is committed to. The replacement behavior is awareness of the behavior and the remedy is to act when the awareness is observed. Observe and act is the replacement behavior. Something needs attention and the brain has accepted that the energy is available to you to get the task done and the time is now. Excuses are part of your non-useful behavior. If fatigue is actually present and the task can not be completed, then you must honor that energy with the commitment to address the issue immediately after energy is restored. Other tasks may be at hand and piling up, but you are committed to this one and when completed you have been successful. With that success, confidence is the reward. A small treat in the Pavlovian way will reinforce the behavior as well and assist you in transforming the non-useful behavior to the useful and desired habit of energetic attention to tasks a hand.

Second step: Repetition of course is key in forming new and useful habits. The behavior becomes a part of your reality and therefore you and your self identity. Daily, you are becoming proactive and are proving to yourself that you get the job done efficiently. You are no longer a procrastinator, but a sharp person in control of your life and obligations, a successful and joyful individual with abilities to transform your life and be an example to others.

Once you have mastered the game of self control, masked this time as "procrastination", you have the ability to break the bond of any non-useful behavior, known colloquially as a "bad habit."



"Habits are first cobwebs, then cables."  Spanish Proverb

BODY SCAN

The mind body connection is real. Mind affects the body in many ways. Doing a body scan with your mind can reveal inner secrets of the subconscious that could be limiting your greater potential.

Doing a body scan as part of meditation is essential, but observing the body during a stressful situation reveals a lot and puts you in a place of control and confidence. Observe your body's reaction during the day and learn from it.

Body Talk:

The Head
Sensations around the head, often a tightening around the temples and brows are indicating there is an overload of what you have to make a decision about. Observe the pain or sensation and question why you are in the situation. You choose your life more than you realize. Do you need to be the one in control with all the answers. A price is paid for your need to know. Give yourself a break from being the one with all the answers and let go once in a while and you'll find a way to free yourself from this excess.

Carla

An engineer working in a mostly male environment, Carla was concerned about her relationship.  She came with agitation and nervousness needing to “over” explain her circumstances often repeating herself, eyes piercing as she spoke.  Carla came from a family with two other siblings, a sister and brother. Her father, an accountant was highly regarded in her neighborhood and generous with his tax advice dispensing his services without payment.  He was emotionally distant from his family, retreating to his office or a book when he returned home, but did complain verbally about the neighbors coming by without compensation.  Carla was in a role reversal with her mother finding herself a comforter to her mother’s common and chatter filled rants verbalizing her insecurities   Carla was an excellent student with honors awards.   In high school she tutored math and science and also worked part time as a cashier at a local market. She graduated from a prestigious university and took the first job offered to her.  Carla became the “go to” family member as her father was distant emotionally and her mother disappeared into confusion.  In her explanation about her troubled relationship with her current boyfriend, it became clear that she had attracted what she knew, another person dependent upon her.  A “head” person is the most challenging for hypnotherapy. Carla’s early programming had declared her the “strong one” who needed no help, but was assigned to help.  Typically Carla complained of headaches and overload.  Appealing to her strong sense of logic, she began to see her role more clearly.  Teaching Carla to slowly release the role of “CEO for everybody” began the process of freeing her.  The challenge for Carla was to allow enjoyment of things that gave her a sense of detachment as her ego was tied into her CEO role.  She admired creative people and insisted she had no talent in that area.  She enjoyed cooking and with encouragement started taking cooking classes.  It became the perfect balance for her as she could still nurture, yet find an escape and through time accept the artist in herself who did not have all the answers.  Her relationship with her boyfriend improved. They were a good match and Carla took the leadership role once again. In time she learned to balance her CEO role and harmony between the two followed.

The Neck
Tightness around the neck indicates you have become a beast of burden. Lift up your head and realize your uniqueness. You are spending too much time at the computer or carrying heavy loads, physical or emotional. Observation is the key again as you uncover where you have led yourself. If you found your way there, you can find your way back. Have faith in yourself and the many opportunities that exist for you to express your gifts.

Jaya

An immigrant from a country that subordinated women, Jaya owned a jewelry business.  She hired a male friend from her country for sales and other clerical duties around the store and office.  He assumed the role as dominator soon after he was hired, insisting on doing things his own way and aggressively offering her advise on how to run her business.  She attempted to let him go on several occasions, but he played on her emotions, even insinuating affection for her.  She had an attachment to this man as he was capable and dependable and her English and comfort level in her adopted country were marginal.   He served as protector and offered familiar presence.  Jaya came to me complaining about feeling down and confused.  She had some trouble expressing herself and when I offered the phrase “dis-empowered” to describe her situation, she lit up.  As she spoke, she periodically turned her head back and breathed out an aah sound.  She complained of constant tightening around the neck.  We spoke about whether to continue to employ her friend, but she had come to the decision to keep him and work on herself, as she knew she had the ultimate power as the employer.  We role-played before sessions so that she could experience calmly asserting herself with her employee.  As she put the sessions into practice in her business and in relationship with her employee, she began to notice the neck pain start to disappear.  Her brother made a visit and spent a year living with her. He became associated with her employee and the three often had dinner together.  Her neck pain returned and we worked out a solution.  She had to find a social life outside her business.  Being shy and self-conscious about her English skills, she decided to take a class in the history, culture and philosophy of her homeland.  She eventually met other people she felt an affinity with and managed her life moving forward. As her confidence grew she eventually became involved with an Argentinean man who owned a restaurant not far from her store and who she eventually married.  Jaya worked toward freeing herself from a narrative of family and cultural self-description and assignment. She began to distinguish the useful and non-useful elements from her past and slowly that grip loosened. The neck tightness disappeared as her life unfolded in the direction she truly desired.

The Throat
Pain or restricting sensations around the throat are caused by an imbalance of verbal expression. Is there something you need to express or do you talk excessively? Have a look inside and be brave enough to listen more or get the words out you must express. The world is a better place when you can express your gifts with balance and respect for yourself as well as others.

Victor

Victor was an accomplished musician who appeared very sad.  He was employed by the local symphony and also worked successfully in the entertainment industry.  He was newly married with a new baby on the way and was sent by his wife to get a handle on his anger.  Victor did not feel that anger was really his problem, but it was his wife’s nagging since her pregnancy that set him off.  Sadness and anger often go together.  Victor had an aggressive father that often berated him for his interest in music and lack of interest in a career that would be substantial enough to support him and a family he may have one day.  The father had died just after Victor immigrated to the United States from Romania.  He had mixed feelings about his father at once expressing teary eyes and at other times tightness around his mouth.  He also expressed great love for his new wife even expressing he did not expect to find one so special.  Victor feared in a place deep inside that he did not really deserve his good fortune and would lose it all someday.  He easily connected the dots when we spoke about that fear that his father had programmed into him.  When speaking of his father or his wife, he would swallow uncomfortably, then lift his head and go on attempting with apparent difficulty to define their relationship.  He could never express to his father his love for him and the pain of his passing was still quite present.  Victor could not conceive that fear and anger had anything to do with one another and was sure that sadness was also its own isolated emotion.  We discussed the need to express his love for his wife and also his fear that he may lose her someday.  We discussed this as a remedy for his anger.  He did not quite understand, but said he would attempt this very frightening task.  I explained the cure for fear is to walk through it and the result would always be enlightening regardless of what that outcome would be. We discussed courage and Victor was mildly insulted that I would perceive him as anything less than courageous after what he had accomplished.  We discussed the ever-present challenges in walking toward your dreams.  Victor postponed his next session and finally returned at his wife’s probing.  Anger she said was still his problem and Victor confessed that he could not bring himself to express his fears to her.

She gave birth soon to a beautiful baby son and the marriage thrived for the next couple of years.  Eventually she did end up leaving Victor taking her son with her.  Victor’s career also weakened and he returned to see me three years after the breakup.  He seemed calmer and the difficult swallowing had disappeared.  He still seemed sad and expressed that in having his worst fears realized that he felt he hit bottom and was ready to work on climbing up.  He is making measured progress and says he is mostly helped by the love of his son and is determined to be a brilliant role model for him.  He is still challenged with the concept of fear and anger, but is moving forward and thus far, the swallowing sometimes manifests when he discusses particularly difficult subjects.

Shoulders and Upper Back
Shoulder and upper back pain and stress reveal responsibility syndrome. As a child you may have been the sensitive one in the family that was given the burden of needing to watch out for the other members be they older or younger. You probably carried this behavior into your adult life and you are the one your co-workers can depend on to always take on more. Observe if you are stooping and stand tall, getting others to be responsible for themselves with expectation, not words. You will rise to the top as you have worked for this, being an

adult before your time. You need to always allow more fun into your life. Keep observing your posture and take a leap.

Sophie

Sophie was a successful attorney who made partner quickly in her chosen law firm.  She was head hunted by a number of firms and chose one that was on the opposite coast from where she grew up.  Sophie was the second in line of four children.  Growing up she took on the role of the eldest as that older brother tended towards trouble and spent time in reform school as a youth and served a prison sentence as a young adult.  Sophie described him as the ne’er do well in the family, always expecting things to be done for him.  She described herself as the opposite; responsible, dependable, hard working.  She had few if any friends and preferred work to socializing.  She was the proclaimed “star” in the family with a successful career, multiple real estate holdings and a comfortable portfolio of investments.  She was begrudgingly generous to other family members who would on occasion ask for loans that were paid back slowly.  Sophie came as a confident client who felt the only thing missing in her life was a good relationship.  She had dated infrequently and felt that men were intimidated by her success.  She complained of meeting “needy” men often who admired her, but then told her she was not feminine.  Sophie was also very attractive and had a sense of style and one could see why men would be initially attracted to her.  The only unattractive physical trait that showed prominently was her posture.  Her neck was stooped and this was hard to ignore as she projected such confidence and attractiveness.  When it came to the opposite sex, she said she was usually willing to go out with most men who asked her, as it was a relief from the responsibility of her job.  When we got down to it, she admitted that she was actually a little afraid to say no.  She did not want to be thought of as a snob and she did have trouble relaxing around other people.  She also “felt” for anybody she did not want to date and thought she “owed” at least one date if a guy would ask.  When we got to what Sophie really wanted, it was fairly easy to get to a solution as her true nature was one of a bit of a loner.  But of course nobody is an island.  She enjoyed living alone as she had been depended upon often by other family members, but was never challenged by them.  She had varied interests and stated that she had no problem going to art galleries, walks or movies by herself.  What she had trouble with was accepting her success in a deeper way and saying no.  Sophie opened up when this was revealed to her.  She came only one time and I received a thank you note from her a week or so after, stating how revealing the session was.  I saw her again when she invited me to a small party she gave for only women.  Her eyes were brighter, her stoop diminished and her confidence more healthy and centered.  She had found a great guy who was also a busy professional and was achieving a wonderful balance in her life.  She quickly understood herself through one session, a tribute to her openness, intelligence and willingness to look directly at the problem.

The Heart
Heaviness in the heart indicates a sensitivity that may be out of control. Remember to forgive those around your life, less sensitive than yourself. Those who can appreciate life to the fullest are the most sensitive to its greater value. Those who are less secure know how to find a sensitive soul to bully and foster their illusion of self worth. You are the lucky one, but must gain appreciation of your worth and build self confidence with successes. Small gains build and you become the "captain of your soul". You are the one who will feel pain the deepest and joys the most freeing. Just do not become a boring wimp. Your potential for strength and individuality is very large.

Charles

Charles appeared like a light bulb that was dimming and about to go out.  At first encounter, he smiled a bright smile and almost immediately it dimmed.  He was obviously uncomfortable and acted overly polite.  He relaxed quickly as we began to speak and the dimming smile went out.  I could almost feel the heaviness in his chest, which was sunken a bit inward, and slightly being protected by shoulders that folded a bit forward.  Charles was a successful optometrist in his late thirties with varied interests and many friends.  He was an activist for Ocean Conservancy, an active outdoorsman and an accomplished athlete.  He was a good-looking man that seemed to have it all.  He came to me for insight as to why he could not seem to find the right relationship.  When I complimented him on all he had to offer, he bristled and bit and related he had no problem attracting women, just the right one.  His initial behavior and this comment worked in unison to reveal a bit of a broken man.  He was wounded and worked subconsciously to cover up whatever wound deeply pained him.  He was not quite as confident as a person of his accomplishment would be expected to be.  Charles father had abandoned his mother when she became pregnant with him while she was in college.  In his early years, his grandparents cared him for, but he had no memory of that. His mother married when he was 4 years old and her new husband adopted Charles and by Charles’ account was a loving and caring father.  His parents went on to have twin girls and Charles’ identity moving forward was as the “big brother”.   He was almost eight years old by the time his sisters were born, a third grader who had started school a year early due to his precociousness and intelligence.  The mystery of Charles was unfolding.  He had a sense of disconnection and discomfort from his own identity.  The diminished memory of early years, loving, but distant parents, always the younger member in his school, the big brother with less attention paid when his sisters were born told the story of a child who felt a sense of disconnect, but never was able to acknowledge his subtle inner pain.  Charles called a few days after the session and wanted to relate a dream he had.  He dreamt he was way out in space and was connect to earth by an umbilical cord.  He was starting to related to his own feelings of disconnectedness.  Working on this break through, he started to accept his pained heart.  Visible signs of calm and real confidence began to shine within him.  He found himself letting go of “particular friends” as he put it and started to fee more comfortable around women who he felt were a good match for him.  Charles was “circling the wagon” with friends to feel safe and accepted.  As he moved forward in accepting himself, he started to attract women who matched his criteria for partnership potential.

The Stomach
Sensations and queasiness in the stomach area indicates fear or disgust. Something is bothering you to the extent you feel you need to turn away. The way to free yourself is to accept what is causing the problem. You know what it is, so do not turn your stomach in fear. Have a good look, even if it is in the big pool of you. Balance in digestion affects all parts of the body and its up to you to realize what is bothering you so much that it makes you feel sick. Be brave and own the sensation and have a good look at what you may fear most. Look deeply and come out into the light. 

Kylie

When I first met Kylie, she exuded shame and fear.  Her boyfriend had just left her and she was in despair.  Her roommate who had been recommended to me by a former client called me to their apartment.   The roommate feared she was suicidal.  Kylie could barely speak, but finally she started to clutch her stomach and then burst out into a flood of tears.  She said her stomach was cramping and was in terrible pain.  I suggested the emergency room and she quickly retracted with a firm no.  I finally got her talking.   Kylie was far from home.  She was an English lady with a dysfunctional family she was attempting to break free from.  The common conflict of missing the familiarity of circumstances, no matter their dysfunction propels one into the confusion of wanting to be free, yet still feeling the affection for family members.  As Kylie began to describe her background, she revealed a “child” very unsure of herself with no real foundation from which to grow.  She was at this point in her life “frightened to death”.   Her mother was a depressive and her brother had attempted suicide himself.  Kylie had not found a way to the light in her attempt to distance herself.  She brought the darkness with her.  As she kept folding over with her hands over her stomach, I told her to feel the pain there and asked her what it was.  She said she felt no real pain there.  I got her to understand that she was searching for a place to put it.  Then I asked her if she would just like to let it go.  She did not need to hold it there.  This was somewhat of a revelation to her and she began to listen.  During the progressive relaxation technique, more tears fell.  After calming her, she seemed brightened, yet felt the need to keep discussing her pain.  It took many sessions to get Kylie to a place of empowerment.  Deep habits and programming take as much time to break as they take to imbed themselves.  And habits imbed without permission as they are taught by a family structure and narrative.  Kylie had no real idea how to free herself, but worked on techniques I taught her about empowerment.  She gradually broke some of her chains, but would often return to destructive thinking.  She would feign over confidence at times, which actually helped her in being victorious rather than a victim.  As the saying goes, “fake it ‘til you make it.”  The stomach issues were a challenge and she would gain and lose weight depending on what was going on in her life.  The gain came with confidence and the loss with despair.  As she became “lost” in creating opportunity for herself, she would “find” the different aspects of herself that showcased her many talents and gifts.  The road to liking and accepting herself was becoming more natural and joyful to her.  Her physical problems reached a balance along with her mental challenges.  She learned the courage of facing fear rather than placing it somewhere to grow and create constant and darkening shadows.

 
IBS
IBS, irritable bowel syndrome is often found in "people pleasers". Women are often afflicted as the ones who have to be approved of. Break through this by learning to say no. Definitively but with calm assertive control. Let it be OK that somebody does not like you.  Assistance from a medical professional may be needed with this as medications are available, but as always keep your responsibility for co-partnering with medical professionals as they see many patients and you are unique.

Francine

Briefly about Francine who suffered from IBS; She had been overloaded with a new life after getting married.  She came to get her “mind in order” so as to work out a new move, new extended family and friends and a new job.  After the second session, Francine had fewer problems with her IBS.  The mind solves and soothes when correctly utilized and Francine learned quickly the lessons of attention and reprogramming.  Since IBS is a clinical disorder sometimes treated with medication, the reference here is that the cooperation of the mind along with any medicine or other conventional treatments can work as a synchronistic remedy.

The Legs
Leg pain and aches that keep you from sleeping may indicate that you want to run from something, or need to run or get more quickly to your goals. Usually this is the something that may be keeping you back. Examine what it is you really want. Walk "towards" your dreams. You may need to actually begin to take long walks to relieve the tension and allow your mind to release thoughts and reveal to you what dreams you have waiting. As easy a remedy as walking benefits in many ways.

Lucie

After turning forty years old, Lucie had gained a lot of weight.  She was seeing an MD for hormonal therapy, so taking that into consideration, she was advised relative to the purity of the session in connection with this outside treatment going on as well.  Lucie’s mother and grandmother both died around age 50.  She surmised that in the back of her mind, she had some anxiety about this, but said she was working on it and dealing with it in her own way.  She had mixed feelings about her mother as many women do.  We love them deeply and the issues around them often come up as we grow and have our own children and  careers.  Lucie described her mother as loving, generous and controlling.  She was threatened by any differing view that Lucie held.  Knowing this, Lucie was careful to avoid this Achilles tendon with her mother.  Lucie was not in a relationship but had many female friends and acquaintances that kept her social life busy.  She claimed she would like to be in a relationship, but felt it may never “happen”.  Lucie was an only child and had a conflicted relationship with her father. She felt disconnected from him and had favored her mother when arguments arose between her parents.  Lucie had some complicated feelings and narrative about loss and abandonment that showed up in conversation, but could not own them.  She complained of tightening in her legs that awakened her at night and wanted to find a way to relieve the problem.  Her doctor could not identify any clinical association with the problem, so she was recommended to me.  Lucie was a somnambulist, that is she went deeply into hypnosis very easily.  Under hypnosis, we can identify “ab reactions”, body movement which when repeated can be associated deeper fears and anxieties.  Lucie would start to twitch her ankles involuntarily and then open and close her eyes quickly.  During the post hypnotic session, she was surprised to learn of the reactions she had.  Working on this she came to realize some of the pain and fear she held tightly and deeply in her subconscious.   Her greatest challenge was to forgive her father as she began to understand her parents’ relationship through more adult eyes.  Awareness allowed Lucie to let go and rest more deeply.  She came for numerous sessions and showed slow, but marked improvement.  Her weight gain stabilized and eventually dropped some of the excess as her enlightenment and personal awareness grew.

Mind~Body
The mind body connection and the power of the mind in healing should not go unnoticed. You are always invited to test the power of your own mind. Your body is the receptacle for your thoughts. Let your body be the indicator for damaging thoughts and review with a body scan on regular intervals. Practice body scans and observations of body sensations. Unchecked the mind can cause body problems and health consequences. Do not underestimate the power of your mind. If you can make yourself ill, you can make yourself well. Your choices are very powerful and you must always be a co-partner with any health practitioner when it comes to full holistic health.


"Joy is a return to the deep harmony of body, mind and spirit that was yours at birth and can be yours again."  ~~Deepak Chopra

MANAGING FEELINGS and EMOTIONS

Feelings are important. Working to achieve "positive" feelings brings you to a more powerful energy. The laws of attraction work in conjunction with feelings. When an uncomfortable feeling is experienced, let your heart be the guide. What triggered it? Examine and accept. Turn to the feeling of peace and allowance. Think about how you want to feel and tell yourself you are starting to feel more relaxed and positive. You have the power to make it happen. Keep working at it until you create the feelings that make you feel more confident and self assured. Letting your emotions be subject to daily drama, you are giving up and giving in to circumstances beyond your control. Learn to use the power of your heart and logical mind to get in control of your feelings.

When the powerful emotions of loss and disappointment become overwhelming, this is the time to be "with" the feeling. It is part of the life experience. Love and loss go together. Love is the gift that never leaves, even if the loved one is gone. You own the experience of loving and you will experience the joy of love again in memory and with those still with you and those you have yet to meet. Understanding this you can allow the feelings of enrichment and joy that are a part of any love story. You attract love by being loving.

Prove to yourself that the emotions and feelings you want to experience can be practiced. Without being excessive, "fake it 'til you make it." Feeling good and happy attracts those emotions in others and then reinforces that feeling in yourself. The life you create, should be the life you want. Be willing to work through feelings to get to the place you want to be and attract all that you want. Nothing succeeds like success. When working through obstacles, keep the heart up and know in your mind that your are learning from the experience. Take the lesson in with joy and watch and see how what you really want keeps showing up in your life.

Expect the best for yourself and work towards that goal. Know that being the master of your emotions and feelings will keep you evolving to a level of joy that will grow ever stronger.

Most of life is easier and more logical than we are programmed to think. Observe how as you gain control the laws of attraction are working in your favor. Trust that you can never be overwhelmed by out of control emotions and learn to trust the wisdom of life. If you are here, you came from a long line of successes. The more you are willing to educate yourself about Source and your relationship to the Greater Energy, the lighter and more magical life becomes. Life is wise, but fragile.

Angels have wings because they take themselves lightly.

Know Source, Know Self. 

"Life isn't about finding yourself, its about creating yourself."
George Bernard Shaw

POWER OF WORDS...and some words to avoid.

We all know the power in words. It is the words we speak to ourselves though that matter most. Balance is always key to success. When you are winning, speed up and when your are losing, slow down. As you achieve, you become more confident and as confidence increases you achieve more. One goes with the other. When you find that things stop going your way, your ego may have tripped you up. Time to slow down and assess. If you feel you made an error in some way, its the way you talk to yourself about situations that really matters.

You are the one in control, but not so much for an absolute outcome. There are too many variables in life for winning all the time and nobody always wins. But you are always in control of how you are handling the obstacles that inevitably show up in life. Obstacles are merely mountains or molehills to sharpen your skills... to make you smarter, better. Acceptance is key in moving over obstacles and speaking to yourself in your adult voice for right solutions to appear.

What to say to your higher self when that demon of doubt or frustration starts to send you into that angry child we all have inside:

*I will find a way around this.
*I will overcome feelings of doubt and fear, as I am better than this.
*That job did not work out, but I know there is something else for me.
*The relationship ended, what can I learn from this.
*I know I deserve to be loved and to love.
*I have a unique gift and nobody is "me-er" than me.
*Whatever the problem, I know I can find or create a solution.
*The more I allow good feelings, the more I will attract what is good for me.
*Life is easy when I go with the flow.
*If I want a happy day, I need to give a smile.
*I know if I do my best, things will work out in ways that I can only imagine and doing
  my best, I will leave the details up to the Greater Power.

Empowering words are something you teach yourself when you decide to design your dream life. This kind of self talk becomes a habit and you will see the result. Test yourself with corrective adult self talk when the next stress or struggle seems to show up. Feelings are extremely important. Notice how you are changing the feeling inside to one of sadness, frustration, doubt, anger to acceptance, empowerment, calm and assurance. You are proving to yourself that you have this power of control. As in any discipline, practice is the key and the more you make logical adult self talk a habit, it will overtake you and you will become the master.

Test the process, do not "try" it. This is one of the words to eliminate from your vocabulary. Trying implies failing. Testing and working on a process just shows you how much more you have to learn and also how far you have come. Conscious engagement enables empowerment as you are involved in the process and are accepting of the result. Tell yourself (and others): I will 'work' to finish the project, I will do my best to clear my schedule to make the event. If you "try" to finish or "try" to make the event, you may fail. A powerful difference in the wording.

Expect good results, do not "hope" for things. Hope is not an action word. Eliminate this word from your self talk and general vocabulary. Working toward the result you desire and expecting the best outcome, your chances of the best result are heightened as you are in the moment, engaged and 'in action'.

Should is not a particularly friendly word to adults or children for that matter.  How do you feel when somebody, often in general conversation tells you that you "should" take this remedy, see this movie, go to this place. You know very well that you "should" do what you choose to do.  So "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" and eliminate this word as a suggestion. 

Never and Always are words to avoid as time reveals to us.  We want to 'never' compromise ourselves for less than we deserve or 'always' do our best, but perfection is a process and never actualized.  We are human.

Just be conscious of when you slip and say: try, hope, should, never and always and you will experience an awakening to a crisper realization of self and other awareness.

As you master your self talk, you will have greater successes and much better communication with others. Self mastery is its own reward and it starts with how you treat and respect yourself and connect with your world as a whole.

"If the sun and moon were ever to doubt, it is likely they would surely go out"
William Blake

SELF HYPNOSIS

HOW IT STARTS

As a Hypnotherapist, I am always ready for the question: "Can any body be hypnotized?" Well here is the real scoop. EVERYBODY on planet earth has been hypnotized or programmed in one way or another. Your beliefs and MO (modus operandi) are all a part of your early programming, ie hypnosis. As an infant you come into the world fresh and sweet and ready to be programmed with information from parents, relatives, religious leaders, teachers, friends, TV, etc. Get the picture? A young child being nurtured by people and environment has no "filters". Filters start to kick in around 7 years of age when peers and self get a sense of right and wrong. By that time, much of the non-useful and mostly well intended programming and hypnotic suggestion has prescribed and described you.

As an adult, if you are observing your life as problematic, you have the choice to first accept the difficulty and then the opportunity to structure change. You can break out of bad habits formed by early non- useful programming. By observing and questioning messages of earlier years, you are starting to take adult responsibility for your choices and ultimately your success.

So here is some freeing information. As an adult, the only hypnosis is self-hypnosis. By choosing NOT to accept or believe this valuable information, you are limiting your own power and refusing to take on the adult role of accountability.

SELF-HYPNOSIS

As a healthy adult, you are the one accepting suggestions. Working with a skilled facilitator, you take the responsibility for accepting the previously agreed upon "suggestions" in the pre-hypnotic discussion with the therapist. Working with a trusted and skilled practitioner is by far the most effective and valuable road to quick and lasting results. If you are unwilling or unable to find a person you feel comfortable with and would like to test your own skills, the method is fairly simple.

A voice other than your own, with positive affirmations used before you work these techniques, will put you in a space to receive yourself as leader and commander of your own life. A CD with a trusted soothing voice can suffice. This experience will not personalize the programming, but can assist you in confidence and self knowledge and will give you an insight into the process leading to a more confident decision should you choose to hire a hypno-therapist. The following techniques are to foster confidence and insight. Again, working with a successful and knowledgeable therapist is recommended as a skilled practitioner can get to the route of the problem in a way that the simple self-hypnosis techniques cannot. With most of my clients, I liken the non-useful early programming to a splinter in your finger. It is irritating and you can feel the pain, and it stays on your mind until it is removed. Easily removed, you move forward again until the next "splinter" shows up for removal. Like a splinter that stays imbedded, it can get infected and cause more serious problems. So paying attention to the the pain can reveal a way toward freedom and dream fulfillment as you become aware of what is holding you back and work to release limiting beliefs.

THE SIX SIMPLE STEP FOR SELF HYPNOSIS REPROGRAMMING

1) Get yourself into a comfortable position on a bed or couch with your legs elevated
slightly and your head elevated higher than when you go to sleep.

2) Put your right hand over your heart and your left hand over your solar plexis.

3) Observe your breathing and as you observe the breath observe also that your breath
is deepening and your body is relaxing.

4) Observe slowly each part of your body going from head to toe and allow relaxation to
occur just by noticing any areas of tension. Note these quietly and just let go.
Be aware of any thoughts that may come into your mind and allow them and let them go.
Know that you are in a safe place fully supported by the bed or couch you are reclining
on. Know too that your are safe with your own thoughts. Take notice also of the parts of your body that are retaining tension.

5) As you become relaxed and breathing continues to deepen, visualize what it is that you
want for yourself right now and accept that it is coming into fruition. Allow thoughts
that come into your mind to "be" and let go gently as you greet them. You are designing
YOUR vision in this hypnotic state between waking and sleeping where you are in complete
control. Should you fall asleep, accept it as this may happen at first, but your
dreams may become much more clear.

6) Be with your image for as long as you want and then keep it in your heart as you replay
the CD you have chosen with the trusted voice and positive affirmations.



Now empowered to conquer fears that may be a barrier to your dreams, you have taken steps toward the successes you know you deserve. Create habits that lead to success. This is the experience of self-hypnosis: creative, useful, empowered, connectedness. You are here to realize your dream, your Self.


SELF KNOWLEDGE>>>CONFIDENCE>>>SUCCESS

HYPNO-COACHING FAQ

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS:

Do I lose control when in the hypnotic state?  

NO. This is discussed during the initial consultation. Nobody is ever out of control and can choose at any time to speak or relate a feeling. The process is interactive. I once viewed an actress during a staged hypnosis event behave like a chicken. She chose to participate and accept that role or "suggestion". She was acting and fully aware and in acceptance of her need to put on a show. This type of "staging" is only for theatre and has nothing to do with therapeutic technique.


What exactly is the "hypnotic state"?

During hypnosis, you are in a state of awareness between sleep and wakefulness. It is that state of consciousness just before you fall asleep where you can be placed and kept for a time for the allowance of agreed upon suggestions to be assimilated. You have experienced self induced hypnosis without being aware of this many times. An example is when driving on a freeway and you get caught up in your thoughts and find you have missed an exit. You are fully aware and in control of your driving, but your thoughts have taken over the need to exit. You become aware again with a realization and this will probably not happen for some time because you became aware of it.


Can anybody be hypnotized?

In reference to the above explanation on self induced hypnotic state, yes anybody can achieve this state and many of us do frequently. Anybody who chooses can be induced into hypnosis for useful purpose. Having a mindset of fear and mistrust about the process will create a barrier that may be transcended with the cooperation of the mind. The purpose of hypnosis is actually reprogramming for beneficial results. Clarity and empowerment rather than immobility and fear are the desired and expected outcome. Persons who achieve the success they expect have transcended the non-useful programming that all humans have been subject to. Trust is incorporated through the conversation period and then through an extremely pleasant progressive relaxation technique that most people fine euphoric.

Does Hypnosis work?  

This, the most common question I have left last purposely.  Having read any of the above should take you to the conclusion that yes it does and IS the best method for transformation. Everyone is a product of early hypnosis with programming from unapproved sources, you now have the choice to master your own life using the tool that accesses the subconscious with YOU in the driver's seat. 

LIFE IS A DARING ADVENTURE OR NOTHING AT ALL
Helen Keller

MY PROCESS: WHAT TO EXPECT

ACTION + ATTENTION = RESULTS        

The first step is a free 1/2 hour consultation to assess if we are good candidates for working together. The process is explained and any questions handled. It is the initial step into the comfort zone for the client, and for me as an assurance that results can be achieved. We will conduct a simple session so that you get a feel for the process. If we determine a full session is in order, you will be sent an agreement form to sign and return before the start of the first session.

Also, a handwriting sample must be sent along. Handwriting tells me a lot about how to work with you and will reveal some aspects of your thoughts that may be holding you back. Handwriting is an ideo-motor response (directly from the brain).

The first session may take up to 90 minutes. It is necessary to get to the core of what you are really needing. Follow-up sessions if needed are usually around an hour. You are charged by the session, not by the hour as time is relative and results are the purpose of the sessions. My expertise allows me to get to the heart of your request and reveal to you a direct route to an outcome because your mind is cleared of any debris that is impeding your progress.

"Whether you think you can or think you cannot, you are right." Henry Ford


"Let yourself be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really Love." Rumi

HYPNO-COACHING

Hypno-Coaching is a combined use of hypnotherapy and personal development coaching created to facilitate progressive transformation with minimal sessions and lasting results.
My specialized technique in hypno-coaching was developed, honed and improved over many years of practice. It is a direct entry into the mind for clearing, centering and change. This is an extraordinarily comfortable, safe, relaxing and empowering modality for permanent evolution into the life of your desires. This work can be done over the phone, through skype or in person.

The full session includes evaluation of what I call your DNAprint. Observing body language and "ab" reactions (body's response to a mental stimuli),  along with brief personal history and  handwriting analysis, the client is evaluated as to basic personality characteristics and suggestibility profile.  From this we work on the holistic heart/mind connection. Your life experience started at birth with an energy particular only to you. Therefore you possess gifts and talents unique only to you...as well as challenges. This is your True Gift from Source. Your early programming likely interfered with the natural talents that are the genius within you. The clients I work with come to understand this and are eager to uncover the True Self which is the path to Enlightenment, Joyfulness, Fulfillment and Sharing: Soul, Spirit, Physical Comfort, Relationship.  This is the "4 ways of Abundance". Success is the word used to describe this state of higher awareness and is the natural outcome of understanding and employing the techniques as habit on a daily basis. The technique I developed is the BOTS (tm) system and when made a habit, transforms beyond your dreams because YOU have chosen to step into your greater potential.

We are all here to serve one another. Joy is meant to be shared. The true joy is that of being in one's place of True Self. Living life in a joyful state is shared naturally as your good feelings are transmitted to others. Once received, joyful energy bounces back.  One session with a knowledgeable, experienced and successful coach is priceless to those who have chosen to access personal empowerment. Taking action with your full participation is guaranteed to astound and enlighten your senses and allow you to feel alive in a way that may be quite new to you. One of my sessions can achieve this. Follow up sessions are available, but often needed only sparingly as I teach you to capitalize on your own power.

"Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure...its is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us....your playing small does not serve the world. You were born to manifest the glory that is within you." Marianne Williamson

CHOICE...FREEDOM...CONFIDENCE...NO LIMITS...SUCCESS

ABOUT HYPNOSIS

A BRIEF HISTORY

The term "hypnosis" was coined in the 19th century by James Braid, M.D. from Scotland based on his observations, but goes back further to Franz Mesmer (from which the term "mesmerized" is derived). Mesmer noticed that health had an unusual relationship to thoughts and universal force. Further back, early Greek literature refers to "trance states". More recently in the 1960's, Dr. Milton Erikson moved the practice forward and into the mainstream with his successes in the field. When John Kappas, PhD, founder of Hypnosis Motivation Institute in Tarzana, Californina, video recorded hypnotherapy sessions, his genius demonstrated the outstanding result and assured and certified Hypnotherapy as the most useful and necessary element for successful change.

METHOD FOR TRANSFORMATION

The myth and mystery surrounding hypnosis can easily be eradicated. The state of hypnosis is simply mind condition similar to that between waking and sleeping. You are not fully awake, yet in control and not asleep. It is the state where the sub-conscious can be accessed and "reprogrammed". In the early years of a life, conditioning and programming occurred as a result of environment and information entered a youthful subconscious without any "filters". As one matures, much of the early programming may no longer be useful and is often destructive to well being and an obstacle to full success. Through hypnosis, the subconscious reprogramming is done with agreement of a mature individual now made aware of the "filters".  Mind "viruses", those destructive subconscious beliefs, can be cleansed and a refreshed and more logical mind is enabled. The client now learns control of the mind leading to a subconscious that serves rather than represses.

In the care of an experienced and skilled practitioner, a client has the best and most remarkable real opportunity for change and success. As with any attempt at transformation, it is ultimately the responsibility of the individual to participate fully in the process. First a conversation between the therapist and client clarifies the intent and agreed upon suggestions are determined and utilized during the hypnotic session. Since trust has been established, any discomfort can be communicated though discomfort is often the direct route to awareness and release from limiting habits and beliefs. Now feeling secure, the client can feel assured that hypnosis has been established as safe, necessary and useful modality for permanent change.

YOUR THOUGHTS REFLECT YOUR ENVIRONMENT: CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS AND YOU WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE!