TIME: MAGIC & ILLUSION

Slow down for a moment and imagine time stopping.  Be silent for a minute or two and you are bound to notice that time did not stop, you did.  Consider now that time is an illusion and that the "churning of events" is what we often refer to as time.  But time is a constant eternal present.  The sun rises and sets daily and in a few billion years will burn out and collapse into a black hole.  Events transpire all in the Eternal Present.

The beauty of this little meditation is the grasp of reality one can muster taking the "time" to accept the concept.  The great masters of Buddhism understood the real sense of this and related that "time is an illusion".  At first it may seem counter intuitive.  We all have watches after all.  But "playing" with the concept and considering it deeply for a period, will enlighten to a place where time becomes an ally because the illusion is broken and empowerment begins.  "Controlling" or "managing" time starts to reveal itself as foolish and mundane.

The empowerment arises when one realizes that within the totality of existence,  you are the chooser on how you work or create within your own experience.  When you learn to value your own experience over time, time itself tends to disappear.  You become one with the present, the eternal present and your relationship to time shifts to you being the master and time, the servant or ally.

Once the illusion of time is understood, the magic happens.  Those who would teach or accept time management as a useful way to live are honoring the world in all its madness of deadlines, need to do, and slavery to a system that has a basis in linear structure.  Living this way, time is short and suddenly you may come to a point in life where you wonder where time has gone.  It is doubtful you will have these thoughts if you come to see your life as an experience in which you are fully present.  You then see and experience all as a part of just being, living fully, connected to a whole that is much larger than the linear time clocks of structured society.  You claim your existence separate yet within the structure, choosing from a soulful Self the best way for you to align with time.

Now this may seem difficult to grasp at first, but taking steps to engage the system of allowing self and detachment from time will transform fairly easily relative to your resistance level.  If you have always been resistant to change, the process of course will take longer.  A person who engages in life
with more of a flow will grasp more easily.

Simply test the idea.  Start the day telling yourself, (programming yourself) that you will experience time the way the sun moves around the planet, slowly, but with absolute determination and ownership.  You will get everything completed that needs to be completed.  We often put more upon ourselves than is necessary and then proclaim that we "just don't have the time".  You have the same amount of time that anybody has, it's just how you choose to use your time that is so important.  As with anything in re-programming, allow the process to unfold.  You become expert at what you do daily and with greatest attention.  As the process moves forward, you will begin to notice that time does become an illusion or at least has taken its place in perspective.  You will notice that you are more calm, and have the feeling of confidence building as you realized you are in control of life more than you ever imagined.  This can be your freeing dance with reality rather than continuing as the slave to time you allowed in the past.  Making this a habit replaces the stress you have submitted to in your previous life.

Good habits can replace non-useful behavior and put you in the role of victor vs. victim.  Believe that you can conquer the idea that time has power over you and repeat the behavior of a confident person who knows that time works with you and is an ally that allows you to be your best and most confident and evolved self.

What is time? If no asks me, I know what it is.  If I wish to explain, I do not know.
~St Augustine 

DEEP RESTFUL SLEEP PROMOTES CLEAR MIND AND WEIGHT LOSS

Anybody who has suffered from chronic fatigue appreciates the value of a good night's rest when it comes along.  Contributing to feelings of well being and mood elevation, all goes better after deep rest.  Lack of deep rest can lead to depression, weight gain, accidents and confusion.  It is as necessary as proper diet and exercise for total health.  Rest and sleep cannot be taken for granted.  It is something you deserve and should demand for yourself.  In the stressful over stimulated world that surrounds us, you can be hypnotically drawn into accepting the stimulus, and never allowing retreat from noise and distraction.  It is up to you to figure out a way and routine that allows a daily shelter or withdrawal from daily pressure.  Balance is key to a happy life.  Being over stimulated when you need sleep most, actually contributes to the circle of anxiety making deep rest even more elusive.  To restore balance, the following techniques will help.   As you take control of your waking life, you must take control of your rest.

Dreams happen as a result of one of the stages of sleep that allows your mind to release thoughts and energy.  Just as your body releases waste, dreams do the same to help you clear your mind.  All of the body processes including digestion are happening as you sleep.  Fatigue stresses digestion and deep sleep allows the body to metabolize more easily.  Both a clear mind and rested and restored body will lead to weight loss if caloric intake and exercise are also in balance.  High calorie comfort foods are craved and mindlessly introduced into your body when fatigued.  As children, we naturally went into deep sleep.  As adults, most of us have to relearn how to do this.  Imagine every day followed by a deep restful night's sleep.

Decide for yourself you will enjoy a night of deep rest rewarded by an energetic joyful day to follow.

Helpful tips: 

** Exercise at least 40 minutes a day.  Move in some meaningful way.  You can do this.  Just dancing to music will do the job.  Walking is the easiest and can be done just walking through the mall.  It burns calories, releases stress, and allows the mind to "download".  Go either by yourself or with a companion that will not talk about the day's problems or goings on.  Walking in Nature will release tension and stress 100 fold.  Go with a not too chatty friend or by yourself for the best results.

** Learn to eat by consuming the highest carbohydrates and protein meals earliest in the day.  Eliminate sugar from you diet as much as possible.  Read labels and create a diet mostly free of processed foods.  Eat lighter as the day wears on and no coffee/caffeine beverages or excessive alcohol after about 6pm.  A small glass of wine or beer before bedtime can assist you to relax.  Fruit or lightly dressed salad are good snacks a few hours before bedtime and help with digestion.  High calcium and magnesium foods: milk, soy milk or almond milk will soothe as calcium and magnesium act to relax the nervous system.  Tryptophan works when your stomach is nearly empty: so a light snack of these tryptophan containing foods will help; almonds, turkey, warm milk.

** Minimize sugar intake and be sure to have a protein snack in the afternoon to keep the blood sugar from dropping.  Afternoon fatigue leads to your craving for comfort foods, carbs, and caffeine which will affect the natural cycle and can lead to restlessness and interrupted sleep patterns.

*** A perfect before bedtime snack: Oatmeal (rich source of sleep inviting melatonin) with banana (contains some melatonin, serotonin, magnesium) and warm milk (calcium rich and contains some tryptophan).

** Observe your breath and breathing throughout the day as this will center you and set the stage for relaxation and balance while oxygenating the brain as breath deepens.

** Prepare for sleep with as much care as you prepare for meals.

> Take time away from stimulating TV and electronics.
> A warm bath always helps.
> Keep your sleeping space uncluttered and never bring work to bed.
> Try sleep CD's with calming music created to program the mind into quiet.
> Take a calcium/magnesium supplement, a natural relaxant for the nervous system
   with almond or soy milk.
> Use natural relaxants: calming teas (such as chamomile), valerian root, 
    caffeine-free aspirin or baby aspirin if your system tolerates it.

The mind body connection is key to balance in weight as in all aspects of living.
Consciously planning and structuring for success, educate yourself about nutrition and what works best for your body.  Taking the leadership role and responsibility for your results insures your brain is engaged fully in the process.  This is key!  Make a decision about your ideal weight and assure yourself that you are capable of achieving your goal.  Back up your goal and vision with action.  Much information is available for consumption, but keep in mind the four necessary steps: excellent nutrition, burning calories by body movement with a program you enjoy, engage the mind for results and success programming yourself for deep restful sleep.  Attention to the first three is likely to insure the last.  Finally a visual affirmation before rest and a smile of assurance will bring your dreams, waking and sleeping, closer to where you want them to be.

So as you lie down to sleep, observe your breathing by concentrating on heart center...by observing the breath (Test this now!), it naturally deepens.  Then scan your body from head to toe, allowing each area to peacefully relax.  Let thoughts flow and let go.  You are re-teaching yourself something you knew as a child, to let go into deep relaxing sleep.

SWEET DREAMS!

TO KNOW YOU IS TO LOVE YOU

"Know thyself". Socratic ancient wisdom, simply stated, is the formula for success in all areas of life. Interestingly most wisdom is ancient. Humans seem to have figured it out thousands of years ago. The bigger question is why are so many still so confused? The obvious answer is, if the information is not given by your nurturers, then you have to figure it out for yourself. Many do not consider that there may be more to learn than what you are taught. For those in places of distress about success, relationship, and money, the big three areas if concern, the answer is again ancient: Look Inward.

The reality of you is that you have arrived here against all odds.  Think of the forces that worked to favor your birth and entry into life.  Evolution, conquest of disease and hardship by your forebears, the "coincidental" meeting of your parents and all the many things that could have been in place to thwart your arrival and special place on the planet.  YOU are part of something Great and that is supported by fact.  You may be stuck and not realize the importance of your being, and that is only supported by illusion.

Real success comes first through self acceptance and matures through to self love.  A being can exude an illusion of success with personal wealth, a fine position and a respectable family and group of apparently supportive friends and acquaintances.  But true success is felt within.  Can you have success without feeling happy?  No, that is not true accomplishment and those that create the illusion of success and happiness without really feeling it are living to please an idea and not connected with Self and Life as a truly engaged experience.

So logically, "to know you is to love you" is a truthful statement.  Taking time to look into your soul, your experiences and your accomplishments will allow you to see through the veils of illusion into the real of You.  It is worth your time and energy to start this and to practice on a daily basis.  You will discover that your "mistakes" were just part of the growing process and the "not really knowing" process.  Misjudgements or "mistakes" are just stepping stones toward becoming the best you. These "mistakes" are your greatest opportunities for learning.  If you come to understand your life in this way, you are empowering yourself through true knowledge which is experience.  No teacher can be better than this.  Uplifted from the bonds of ignorance you are also more understanding of others and will likely find yourself in the company of those who are also in a better place as the darker souls with less courage fall away from your life.

As with any success in life, the act of courage is the first requirement.  The noblest act of courage is the willingness to face yourself and your shortcomings, but more importantly your talents.   How often is it the case where one was never told of her gifts at an early age and therefore it was left up to you to learn for yourself what gifts you brought into the world!  This is the usual scenario for most of us as many parents see more of themselves in their children than reality warrants.  And many may see parts of themselves that they spend more time addressing than the true talents of their children that lie waiting to be expressed.  That was then and this is now.  You alone have responsibility for ferreting out your best gifts and talents so that you can perfect them and return them as gifts. That is truly why you, evolving through eons, came to be.

As you may have guessed, they key to an evolving self is to do what you love.  You are honoring yourself and the Greater source you evolved from to be involved in what you love.  If you are working at a job to pay bills, accepting a role prescribed by society, not challenging anything in your life and not doing as a part of your routine something related to your talents, you are surely wasting the most important part of your life.  If you have a hobby you love and spend time working or playing at this interest, this is the joy you give back to the world, even if nobody or very few people know about it.  Love is a vibration and the joy in your time spent doing something you love or gives you pleasure becomes part of the universal energy.  How personal energy is spent does affect universal energy.
As Dr. Goswami reveals, "Vibration is Life."  The ultimate of course is to be paid to do something you love and you have nothing limiting you from working toward that vision if that is a vision in the back of your mind.

Attending to your life and hobbies with Excellence will reveal the best you.  This is your challenge and the more you work to meet it, the closer you will become to realizing your best and truest self.... and the happier you will be.  Take up the challenge and you will quickly come to realize that you are worth knowing and the more you know about the soulful you, the easier it is to forgive yourself....and others. Move forward with this idea and engage in useful and joyful activities.

"Do you want to know who you are? Don't ask. Act. Your actions will delineate and define you."
~Thomas Jefferson

POWER OF MIND IN WEIGHT CONTROL: Stress, Lies, & Video Tape

For the many frustrated with the desire to drop pounds, relax and just breathe a bit while you read this. Take a breath!

There now. If you are still reading, you may have noticed a sense in that moment of acceptance. The first step with any goal is to first accept where you are and allow your mind to view the situation objectively. You have the responsibility for your own health and weight balance, but just allow yourself the time to reflect on your journey a moment. There are three main reasons outside of calorie intake and output that may be contributing greatly to weight gain.

Reason #1 STRESS: Pressured with day to day obligations of work and family you may be medicating yourself with comfort foods you subconsciously crave as a result of the stress. In response to the poorer or absence of any nutritive value of these foods, stress only increases and the non-useful responses feed one another. Sleep is disrupted or not experienced fully allowing the body to de-stress into its natural state of deep relaxation leading to the deep sleep needed to promote body processes and complete metabolism. As stressful behavior continues, even with a fairly balanced diet, the cycle continues and you are unable to experience life to its fullest offering with this destructive cycle. You may also notice that the people closest to you also have weight out of balance, subconsciously reinforcing the mindful elements that are keeping all stuck in the cycle. This is the group effect and acceptance of stress as a reality.  Be the leader in your group and practice a new way of living and thinking.  Mountains are conquered with single steps.
"Problems are not solved with the same thinking that created them."  Albert Einstein

Reason #2  HORMONAL IMBALANCE  Stress can also be the cause of hormonal imbalance and you may be able to naturally get back into better balance through diet, exercise and stress release.   You may need to talk to your health care professional about this, but remember that healthy habits are your responsibility.  Choosing to be a conscious practitioner and partner with your doctor regarding your health will insure the best outcome.

Reason #3 LAZY MIND  This may be very hard for those not willing to exercise the mind as well as the body to understand the power of mind in all you do.  The overload we have today of technology, cell phones, smart phones, magnified TV, internet can program and control you in ways you do not notice or just take for granted.  You are plugged in and cannot get free of mind numbing habits that disempower you rendering you a robot of your own non-useful habits.  Examining each aspect of your life and committing to improve on every level is actually a mental exercise that will burn calories.  Stay a robot to your schedule and beliefs and nothing will improve, but change which is constant will continue. You will change for the worse. You have the power of your own mind and its your responsibility to use it wisely.  Wisdom grows from a well fed mind.  A well fed mind knows how to feed a body. Repeating the same behavior and expecting a different outcome is a form of insanity.

In observing the growing obesity problem, I know very well that these people are not eating as much as it would appear.  The problem is the inability to take control of the mind.  Empowerment is the outcome when one chooses to commit.  Refusing the responsibility of your own thoughts causes stress.  It is much easier to be conscious once you get into practice.  Turn off the TV, cell phone, internet or at least be aware that media is in the market of selling to you; and often selling you what you do not need.  Figure out for yourself what lies you are being told and what lies you are telling yourself.  The new term Nature Deficit Disorder (NDD) describes that we are  disconnected from our Source.  Decide to connect with Nature at some level each day.  Observe a flower, look at the night sky, take a walk and feel the air; then realize that in the scheme of things there is a Great Power that you have access to moment by moment.

The solutions for dropping pounds are within your control and involve these very simple observations.  You can start today to take control and build the confidence of a successful person in control of her own weight.  Take the steps to de-stress, commit to empowering your own mind, stop plugging in endlessly to technology, be aware of your hormone balance, rest well, eat wisely, investigate reality and start to tell yourself the truth, spend time in Nature, spend some time alone.

As your spirit is empowered and lifted, your increasing inner beauty will show on the outside and you will return to the beautiful child of the Universe you were meant to be. 

Know who you are, feed the flower.

Boldness has Genius Power and magic in it. When one definitely commits,  then Providence moves too.   ~~Goethe

LAWS OF ATTRACTION MADE EASY

Universal Law is is a priori; that is, it is present whether or not we are aware of it. It came before us and will stay in place after we are gone. In metaphysics, we speak of the "Laws of Attraction." Many refer to it and many more books are written about it. The laws work for everybody and you can get dangerously caught up in over analyzing or listening and reading about others' experiences. The laws are universal, but your experience is as unique as you are.
"Vedic knowledge is lost because it is so subtle."  John Hagelin, PhD

Here I will attempt to explain simply and teach an easy method for practice. Keep in mind this wise statement when performing the tasks to understanding these laws: "If there is something that I want that I do not have, then there is something I do not know."

After years of working with clients as a personal coach/hypnotherapist, I developed and taught a simple method that can be applied to approaching life's questions and problems. The "BOTS" system: (Breathe, Observe, Test, Share) offers a path to peace, satisfaction and progress and can be applied to any situation.

So using this system, lets see how it applies to the Laws of Attraction. Pay attention to the word "attraction" and understand how little real effort is applied to what you want. If you can trust that you "don't always get what you want, but you get what you need"...(can you hear Mick singing?) then life will hand right to you what you need. Key of course is alignment and integrity with wants and needs.
"Quantum physics can ease the ground of our being."  Amit Goswami, PhD

Do you desire a million dollars? Well the Universe is not about to plop it right down on your bank account just because you have some deep desire and are playing around with a misunderstanding of the 'Laws'. Visualization is but a small part of attracting your desires. Action and planning must be put into place once the desire is determined. But know that the Universe is extraordinarily generous and there are really no barriers to creating the life you desire. Action is the best teacher, but desire implies something outside yourself. So the first step obviously if you have not figured it out yet is connecting with yourself, who you really are, and what your soul is speaking to you about. There are lots of ways to "get" things, but we are discussing here, the Universal Laws of Attraction; easily attracting into your life what brings you true joy.

Many are bound and determined to "desire" what popular culture says we need.  We are seduced daily by advertising, media, social technology ....and by our friends and acquaintances.  We can allow ourselves to believe that what they have or dangle before us is what we want.  Once caught in this trap, it can be a real challenge to escape back into yourself and your own confidence and self acceptance.  That is if you were ever there in the first place.  Early programmers can do a good job excavating your mind and programming with a lot of non-useful information.  And we all must learn to overcome the faulty programming of early experience.

So using the Law of Attraction is nothing more than really understanding that life works for you, not against you.  Trust that this is true; you can test it later after completing the first two steps of the BOTS system.   First, just breathe.  Concentrating on the breath allows the body to relax and notice this as you observe your breathing.  You are now connecting more deeply with the self...maybe for the first time.  Allow yourself to just BE. Being what you want strengthens the attracter force. Imagining a loving relationship coming your way or the one you are in, growing more in love, then practice being a better partner.  As you are performing your daily tasks, be conscious of what you are doing and what thoughts come into your head.  As you practice this, you can feel yourself becoming more in tune and this is when the magic starts to happen.  Look for the clues; they are everywhere.  You get things done more efficiently and with more time to spare as what is unimportant starts to take its proper place.  You find yourself attracting what you are becoming.

So as you breathe and connect, consciously observe the changes taking place within you and around you.  Notice how you have become more calm (or scattered as the case may be when you are learning) attracting more of what you are yourself.  Stepping back to observe your situation, you must take responsibility to what and where you have brought yourself.  Detach and observe, but don' t blame or judge too harshly as this is not a good use of your energy.

Now time for your first test.  Is it working so far?  Do you feel better?  Feeling light and happy attracts the same and soon it becomes a habit.  If you prefer gloomy, you will attract that as well.  There is plenty to go around.  Keep breathing to know self, observing the outcome and soon you will see that you have tested something that does work.  If you just calmly trust life and Universal "Knowing", you will eliminate the struggle that may have gripped you in the past.  You are now free to apply your new knowledge and be an example to others.  Example is the best teacher and when you are sharing in this way, you are of course reinforcing your own knowledge.
"When I teach, I learn."  ~Unknown

As you empower yourself, your outlook will change. Others will notice your confidence and well being and may start to be uplifted as well.  When you share the best of yourself, you are a natural magnet for more of the same.  Keep sharing.
"The secret of creation is containment."  Fred Alan Wolf, PhD

So lets use an example for practice.  You want a new relationship or to improve the one you have.  Breathe it in and commit to the desire.  Tell yourself the Truth. See where you need to improve.  Observe the outcome.  Things are getting better as you improve, as you improve, you attract success in small ways.  Success breeds confidence, you are attracting more of the same.  You are observing this on a daily basis and naturally sharing with those connecting in your sphere.  Making this your daily practice and commitment, your actual desire may change and your awakening could attract something quite unexpected and often superseding the original desire.  Allow all your experiences to strengthen you and expect that you will continue in your joy and that you will attract exactly what you need.  Observe the outcome, take mental notes and before you realize your own power, life will begin to stream easily.
"Vibration is Life; you create a relationship within your vibration."  Dr. Masaru Emoto

Getting what you want suddenly becomes trite as you realize the Laws of Attraction are actually more powerful and useful than a blind desire.  The greatest misconception is that "getting" what you want in life is difficult as you come to understand attracting vs. "getting".  After you grasp the simplicity of the Laws of Attraction, you will have opened a door that will never close as long as you commit to the steps and take responsibility.

Gandhi advises, "Be the change you want to see in the world."  The Laws of Attraction agree; be more of what you expect.

HABITS

Habits are first taught, then developed in the early formative years. Those that served continued. The difficult or adversarial were transformed, dropped or became an obstacle. Habits are programmed into you by your early programmers. (parents, immediate family, environment, etc.) Once you have decided to eliminate an unwanted habit and replace it with another, the transformation can begin.

Key words are "decide" and "replace". The brain has accepted a decision and must replace the behavior vacancy with a more useful behavior. The process is as follows: observe, decide, replace and practice. Everybody is unique and the time it takes to make the transformation is also unique to each individual and is relative to the depth and strength of the habit. Habit replacement is often associated with a timeline. Incorporating this into the practice will not likely help as you may focus on the timeline rather than the new behavior and will disconnect to your uniqueness relative to the habit.

Keep it simple and stick to the procedure. If your brain can accept non-useful information in the form of a bad habit, it can re-program a new and useful suggestion backed up with the desired behavior. What you give attention to will grow. Its the mind first directing the behavior. Observe and accept the behavior, then begin the transforming behaviors.

The steps are as follows:

1) Observe and identify the undesired behavior.

2) Decide that the behavior will change and commit to this decision.

3) Decide on a replacement behavior.

4) Practice and deliver the results that you have committed to and deserve.

This procedure will work for any habit or undesired behavior. But only until one is truly committed and makes the decision for transformation will behavior change. Success will be elusive unless true commitment is in place. And again, success builds confidence.

An example:

Procrastination in general is a common habit and a part of most lives. It becomes a problem when it is overreaching and life is out of control and necessary obligations become overwhelmed. One can "hide" in procrastination. Over thinking a problem can result in paralysis of analysis.

First step: Observe and accept. The behavior is accepted and change is necessary. Be kind to yourself and know the behavior came from some area of wanting to protect yourself. The decision is committed to. The replacement behavior is awareness of the behavior and the remedy is to act when the awareness is observed. Observe and act is the replacement behavior. Something needs attention and the brain has accepted that the energy is available to you to get the task done and the time is now. Excuses are part of your non-useful behavior. If fatigue is actually present and the task can not be completed, then you must honor that energy with the commitment to address the issue immediately after energy is restored. Other tasks may be at hand and piling up, but you are committed to this one and when completed you have been successful. With that success, confidence is the reward. A small treat in the Pavlovian way will reinforce the behavior as well and assist you in transforming the non-useful behavior to the useful and desired habit of energetic attention to tasks a hand.

Second step: Repetition of course is key in forming new and useful habits. The behavior becomes a part of your reality and therefore you and your self identity. Daily, you are becoming proactive and are proving to yourself that you get the job done efficiently. You are no longer a procrastinator, but a sharp person in control of your life and obligations, a successful and joyful individual with abilities to transform your life and be an example to others.

Once you have mastered the game of self control, masked this time as "procrastination", you have the ability to break the bond of any non-useful behavior, known colloquially as a "bad habit."



"Habits are first cobwebs, then cables."  Spanish Proverb

BODY SCAN

The mind body connection is real. Mind affects the body in many ways. Doing a body scan with your mind can reveal inner secrets of the subconscious that could be limiting your greater potential.

Doing a body scan as part of meditation is essential, but observing the body during a stressful situation reveals a lot and puts you in a place of control and confidence. Observe your body's reaction during the day and learn from it.

Body Talk:

The Head
Sensations around the head, often a tightening around the temples and brows are indicating there is an overload of what you have to make a decision about. Observe the pain or sensation and question why you are in the situation. You choose your life more than you realize. Do you need to be the one in control with all the answers. A price is paid for your need to know. Give yourself a break from being the one with all the answers and let go once in a while and you'll find a way to free yourself from this excess.

Carla

An engineer working in a mostly male environment, Carla was concerned about her relationship.  She came with agitation and nervousness needing to “over” explain her circumstances often repeating herself, eyes piercing as she spoke.  Carla came from a family with two other siblings, a sister and brother. Her father, an accountant was highly regarded in her neighborhood and generous with his tax advice dispensing his services without payment.  He was emotionally distant from his family, retreating to his office or a book when he returned home, but did complain verbally about the neighbors coming by without compensation.  Carla was in a role reversal with her mother finding herself a comforter to her mother’s common and chatter filled rants verbalizing her insecurities   Carla was an excellent student with honors awards.   In high school she tutored math and science and also worked part time as a cashier at a local market. She graduated from a prestigious university and took the first job offered to her.  Carla became the “go to” family member as her father was distant emotionally and her mother disappeared into confusion.  In her explanation about her troubled relationship with her current boyfriend, it became clear that she had attracted what she knew, another person dependent upon her.  A “head” person is the most challenging for hypnotherapy. Carla’s early programming had declared her the “strong one” who needed no help, but was assigned to help.  Typically Carla complained of headaches and overload.  Appealing to her strong sense of logic, she began to see her role more clearly.  Teaching Carla to slowly release the role of “CEO for everybody” began the process of freeing her.  The challenge for Carla was to allow enjoyment of things that gave her a sense of detachment as her ego was tied into her CEO role.  She admired creative people and insisted she had no talent in that area.  She enjoyed cooking and with encouragement started taking cooking classes.  It became the perfect balance for her as she could still nurture, yet find an escape and through time accept the artist in herself who did not have all the answers.  Her relationship with her boyfriend improved. They were a good match and Carla took the leadership role once again. In time she learned to balance her CEO role and harmony between the two followed.

The Neck
Tightness around the neck indicates you have become a beast of burden. Lift up your head and realize your uniqueness. You are spending too much time at the computer or carrying heavy loads, physical or emotional. Observation is the key again as you uncover where you have led yourself. If you found your way there, you can find your way back. Have faith in yourself and the many opportunities that exist for you to express your gifts.

Jaya

An immigrant from a country that subordinated women, Jaya owned a jewelry business.  She hired a male friend from her country for sales and other clerical duties around the store and office.  He assumed the role as dominator soon after he was hired, insisting on doing things his own way and aggressively offering her advise on how to run her business.  She attempted to let him go on several occasions, but he played on her emotions, even insinuating affection for her.  She had an attachment to this man as he was capable and dependable and her English and comfort level in her adopted country were marginal.   He served as protector and offered familiar presence.  Jaya came to me complaining about feeling down and confused.  She had some trouble expressing herself and when I offered the phrase “dis-empowered” to describe her situation, she lit up.  As she spoke, she periodically turned her head back and breathed out an aah sound.  She complained of constant tightening around the neck.  We spoke about whether to continue to employ her friend, but she had come to the decision to keep him and work on herself, as she knew she had the ultimate power as the employer.  We role-played before sessions so that she could experience calmly asserting herself with her employee.  As she put the sessions into practice in her business and in relationship with her employee, she began to notice the neck pain start to disappear.  Her brother made a visit and spent a year living with her. He became associated with her employee and the three often had dinner together.  Her neck pain returned and we worked out a solution.  She had to find a social life outside her business.  Being shy and self-conscious about her English skills, she decided to take a class in the history, culture and philosophy of her homeland.  She eventually met other people she felt an affinity with and managed her life moving forward. As her confidence grew she eventually became involved with an Argentinean man who owned a restaurant not far from her store and who she eventually married.  Jaya worked toward freeing herself from a narrative of family and cultural self-description and assignment. She began to distinguish the useful and non-useful elements from her past and slowly that grip loosened. The neck tightness disappeared as her life unfolded in the direction she truly desired.

The Throat
Pain or restricting sensations around the throat are caused by an imbalance of verbal expression. Is there something you need to express or do you talk excessively? Have a look inside and be brave enough to listen more or get the words out you must express. The world is a better place when you can express your gifts with balance and respect for yourself as well as others.

Victor

Victor was an accomplished musician who appeared very sad.  He was employed by the local symphony and also worked successfully in the entertainment industry.  He was newly married with a new baby on the way and was sent by his wife to get a handle on his anger.  Victor did not feel that anger was really his problem, but it was his wife’s nagging since her pregnancy that set him off.  Sadness and anger often go together.  Victor had an aggressive father that often berated him for his interest in music and lack of interest in a career that would be substantial enough to support him and a family he may have one day.  The father had died just after Victor immigrated to the United States from Romania.  He had mixed feelings about his father at once expressing teary eyes and at other times tightness around his mouth.  He also expressed great love for his new wife even expressing he did not expect to find one so special.  Victor feared in a place deep inside that he did not really deserve his good fortune and would lose it all someday.  He easily connected the dots when we spoke about that fear that his father had programmed into him.  When speaking of his father or his wife, he would swallow uncomfortably, then lift his head and go on attempting with apparent difficulty to define their relationship.  He could never express to his father his love for him and the pain of his passing was still quite present.  Victor could not conceive that fear and anger had anything to do with one another and was sure that sadness was also its own isolated emotion.  We discussed the need to express his love for his wife and also his fear that he may lose her someday.  We discussed this as a remedy for his anger.  He did not quite understand, but said he would attempt this very frightening task.  I explained the cure for fear is to walk through it and the result would always be enlightening regardless of what that outcome would be. We discussed courage and Victor was mildly insulted that I would perceive him as anything less than courageous after what he had accomplished.  We discussed the ever-present challenges in walking toward your dreams.  Victor postponed his next session and finally returned at his wife’s probing.  Anger she said was still his problem and Victor confessed that he could not bring himself to express his fears to her.

She gave birth soon to a beautiful baby son and the marriage thrived for the next couple of years.  Eventually she did end up leaving Victor taking her son with her.  Victor’s career also weakened and he returned to see me three years after the breakup.  He seemed calmer and the difficult swallowing had disappeared.  He still seemed sad and expressed that in having his worst fears realized that he felt he hit bottom and was ready to work on climbing up.  He is making measured progress and says he is mostly helped by the love of his son and is determined to be a brilliant role model for him.  He is still challenged with the concept of fear and anger, but is moving forward and thus far, the swallowing sometimes manifests when he discusses particularly difficult subjects.

Shoulders and Upper Back
Shoulder and upper back pain and stress reveal responsibility syndrome. As a child you may have been the sensitive one in the family that was given the burden of needing to watch out for the other members be they older or younger. You probably carried this behavior into your adult life and you are the one your co-workers can depend on to always take on more. Observe if you are stooping and stand tall, getting others to be responsible for themselves with expectation, not words. You will rise to the top as you have worked for this, being an

adult before your time. You need to always allow more fun into your life. Keep observing your posture and take a leap.

Sophie

Sophie was a successful attorney who made partner quickly in her chosen law firm.  She was head hunted by a number of firms and chose one that was on the opposite coast from where she grew up.  Sophie was the second in line of four children.  Growing up she took on the role of the eldest as that older brother tended towards trouble and spent time in reform school as a youth and served a prison sentence as a young adult.  Sophie described him as the ne’er do well in the family, always expecting things to be done for him.  She described herself as the opposite; responsible, dependable, hard working.  She had few if any friends and preferred work to socializing.  She was the proclaimed “star” in the family with a successful career, multiple real estate holdings and a comfortable portfolio of investments.  She was begrudgingly generous to other family members who would on occasion ask for loans that were paid back slowly.  Sophie came as a confident client who felt the only thing missing in her life was a good relationship.  She had dated infrequently and felt that men were intimidated by her success.  She complained of meeting “needy” men often who admired her, but then told her she was not feminine.  Sophie was also very attractive and had a sense of style and one could see why men would be initially attracted to her.  The only unattractive physical trait that showed prominently was her posture.  Her neck was stooped and this was hard to ignore as she projected such confidence and attractiveness.  When it came to the opposite sex, she said she was usually willing to go out with most men who asked her, as it was a relief from the responsibility of her job.  When we got down to it, she admitted that she was actually a little afraid to say no.  She did not want to be thought of as a snob and she did have trouble relaxing around other people.  She also “felt” for anybody she did not want to date and thought she “owed” at least one date if a guy would ask.  When we got to what Sophie really wanted, it was fairly easy to get to a solution as her true nature was one of a bit of a loner.  But of course nobody is an island.  She enjoyed living alone as she had been depended upon often by other family members, but was never challenged by them.  She had varied interests and stated that she had no problem going to art galleries, walks or movies by herself.  What she had trouble with was accepting her success in a deeper way and saying no.  Sophie opened up when this was revealed to her.  She came only one time and I received a thank you note from her a week or so after, stating how revealing the session was.  I saw her again when she invited me to a small party she gave for only women.  Her eyes were brighter, her stoop diminished and her confidence more healthy and centered.  She had found a great guy who was also a busy professional and was achieving a wonderful balance in her life.  She quickly understood herself through one session, a tribute to her openness, intelligence and willingness to look directly at the problem.

The Heart
Heaviness in the heart indicates a sensitivity that may be out of control. Remember to forgive those around your life, less sensitive than yourself. Those who can appreciate life to the fullest are the most sensitive to its greater value. Those who are less secure know how to find a sensitive soul to bully and foster their illusion of self worth. You are the lucky one, but must gain appreciation of your worth and build self confidence with successes. Small gains build and you become the "captain of your soul". You are the one who will feel pain the deepest and joys the most freeing. Just do not become a boring wimp. Your potential for strength and individuality is very large.

Charles

Charles appeared like a light bulb that was dimming and about to go out.  At first encounter, he smiled a bright smile and almost immediately it dimmed.  He was obviously uncomfortable and acted overly polite.  He relaxed quickly as we began to speak and the dimming smile went out.  I could almost feel the heaviness in his chest, which was sunken a bit inward, and slightly being protected by shoulders that folded a bit forward.  Charles was a successful optometrist in his late thirties with varied interests and many friends.  He was an activist for Ocean Conservancy, an active outdoorsman and an accomplished athlete.  He was a good-looking man that seemed to have it all.  He came to me for insight as to why he could not seem to find the right relationship.  When I complimented him on all he had to offer, he bristled and bit and related he had no problem attracting women, just the right one.  His initial behavior and this comment worked in unison to reveal a bit of a broken man.  He was wounded and worked subconsciously to cover up whatever wound deeply pained him.  He was not quite as confident as a person of his accomplishment would be expected to be.  Charles father had abandoned his mother when she became pregnant with him while she was in college.  In his early years, his grandparents cared him for, but he had no memory of that. His mother married when he was 4 years old and her new husband adopted Charles and by Charles’ account was a loving and caring father.  His parents went on to have twin girls and Charles’ identity moving forward was as the “big brother”.   He was almost eight years old by the time his sisters were born, a third grader who had started school a year early due to his precociousness and intelligence.  The mystery of Charles was unfolding.  He had a sense of disconnection and discomfort from his own identity.  The diminished memory of early years, loving, but distant parents, always the younger member in his school, the big brother with less attention paid when his sisters were born told the story of a child who felt a sense of disconnect, but never was able to acknowledge his subtle inner pain.  Charles called a few days after the session and wanted to relate a dream he had.  He dreamt he was way out in space and was connect to earth by an umbilical cord.  He was starting to related to his own feelings of disconnectedness.  Working on this break through, he started to accept his pained heart.  Visible signs of calm and real confidence began to shine within him.  He found himself letting go of “particular friends” as he put it and started to fee more comfortable around women who he felt were a good match for him.  Charles was “circling the wagon” with friends to feel safe and accepted.  As he moved forward in accepting himself, he started to attract women who matched his criteria for partnership potential.

The Stomach
Sensations and queasiness in the stomach area indicates fear or disgust. Something is bothering you to the extent you feel you need to turn away. The way to free yourself is to accept what is causing the problem. You know what it is, so do not turn your stomach in fear. Have a good look, even if it is in the big pool of you. Balance in digestion affects all parts of the body and its up to you to realize what is bothering you so much that it makes you feel sick. Be brave and own the sensation and have a good look at what you may fear most. Look deeply and come out into the light. 

Kylie

When I first met Kylie, she exuded shame and fear.  Her boyfriend had just left her and she was in despair.  Her roommate who had been recommended to me by a former client called me to their apartment.   The roommate feared she was suicidal.  Kylie could barely speak, but finally she started to clutch her stomach and then burst out into a flood of tears.  She said her stomach was cramping and was in terrible pain.  I suggested the emergency room and she quickly retracted with a firm no.  I finally got her talking.   Kylie was far from home.  She was an English lady with a dysfunctional family she was attempting to break free from.  The common conflict of missing the familiarity of circumstances, no matter their dysfunction propels one into the confusion of wanting to be free, yet still feeling the affection for family members.  As Kylie began to describe her background, she revealed a “child” very unsure of herself with no real foundation from which to grow.  She was at this point in her life “frightened to death”.   Her mother was a depressive and her brother had attempted suicide himself.  Kylie had not found a way to the light in her attempt to distance herself.  She brought the darkness with her.  As she kept folding over with her hands over her stomach, I told her to feel the pain there and asked her what it was.  She said she felt no real pain there.  I got her to understand that she was searching for a place to put it.  Then I asked her if she would just like to let it go.  She did not need to hold it there.  This was somewhat of a revelation to her and she began to listen.  During the progressive relaxation technique, more tears fell.  After calming her, she seemed brightened, yet felt the need to keep discussing her pain.  It took many sessions to get Kylie to a place of empowerment.  Deep habits and programming take as much time to break as they take to imbed themselves.  And habits imbed without permission as they are taught by a family structure and narrative.  Kylie had no real idea how to free herself, but worked on techniques I taught her about empowerment.  She gradually broke some of her chains, but would often return to destructive thinking.  She would feign over confidence at times, which actually helped her in being victorious rather than a victim.  As the saying goes, “fake it ‘til you make it.”  The stomach issues were a challenge and she would gain and lose weight depending on what was going on in her life.  The gain came with confidence and the loss with despair.  As she became “lost” in creating opportunity for herself, she would “find” the different aspects of herself that showcased her many talents and gifts.  The road to liking and accepting herself was becoming more natural and joyful to her.  Her physical problems reached a balance along with her mental challenges.  She learned the courage of facing fear rather than placing it somewhere to grow and create constant and darkening shadows.

 
IBS
IBS, irritable bowel syndrome is often found in "people pleasers". Women are often afflicted as the ones who have to be approved of. Break through this by learning to say no. Definitively but with calm assertive control. Let it be OK that somebody does not like you.  Assistance from a medical professional may be needed with this as medications are available, but as always keep your responsibility for co-partnering with medical professionals as they see many patients and you are unique.

Francine

Briefly about Francine who suffered from IBS; She had been overloaded with a new life after getting married.  She came to get her “mind in order” so as to work out a new move, new extended family and friends and a new job.  After the second session, Francine had fewer problems with her IBS.  The mind solves and soothes when correctly utilized and Francine learned quickly the lessons of attention and reprogramming.  Since IBS is a clinical disorder sometimes treated with medication, the reference here is that the cooperation of the mind along with any medicine or other conventional treatments can work as a synchronistic remedy.

The Legs
Leg pain and aches that keep you from sleeping may indicate that you want to run from something, or need to run or get more quickly to your goals. Usually this is the something that may be keeping you back. Examine what it is you really want. Walk "towards" your dreams. You may need to actually begin to take long walks to relieve the tension and allow your mind to release thoughts and reveal to you what dreams you have waiting. As easy a remedy as walking benefits in many ways.

Lucie

After turning forty years old, Lucie had gained a lot of weight.  She was seeing an MD for hormonal therapy, so taking that into consideration, she was advised relative to the purity of the session in connection with this outside treatment going on as well.  Lucie’s mother and grandmother both died around age 50.  She surmised that in the back of her mind, she had some anxiety about this, but said she was working on it and dealing with it in her own way.  She had mixed feelings about her mother as many women do.  We love them deeply and the issues around them often come up as we grow and have our own children and  careers.  Lucie described her mother as loving, generous and controlling.  She was threatened by any differing view that Lucie held.  Knowing this, Lucie was careful to avoid this Achilles tendon with her mother.  Lucie was not in a relationship but had many female friends and acquaintances that kept her social life busy.  She claimed she would like to be in a relationship, but felt it may never “happen”.  Lucie was an only child and had a conflicted relationship with her father. She felt disconnected from him and had favored her mother when arguments arose between her parents.  Lucie had some complicated feelings and narrative about loss and abandonment that showed up in conversation, but could not own them.  She complained of tightening in her legs that awakened her at night and wanted to find a way to relieve the problem.  Her doctor could not identify any clinical association with the problem, so she was recommended to me.  Lucie was a somnambulist, that is she went deeply into hypnosis very easily.  Under hypnosis, we can identify “ab reactions”, body movement which when repeated can be associated deeper fears and anxieties.  Lucie would start to twitch her ankles involuntarily and then open and close her eyes quickly.  During the post hypnotic session, she was surprised to learn of the reactions she had.  Working on this she came to realize some of the pain and fear she held tightly and deeply in her subconscious.   Her greatest challenge was to forgive her father as she began to understand her parents’ relationship through more adult eyes.  Awareness allowed Lucie to let go and rest more deeply.  She came for numerous sessions and showed slow, but marked improvement.  Her weight gain stabilized and eventually dropped some of the excess as her enlightenment and personal awareness grew.

Mind~Body
The mind body connection and the power of the mind in healing should not go unnoticed. You are always invited to test the power of your own mind. Your body is the receptacle for your thoughts. Let your body be the indicator for damaging thoughts and review with a body scan on regular intervals. Practice body scans and observations of body sensations. Unchecked the mind can cause body problems and health consequences. Do not underestimate the power of your mind. If you can make yourself ill, you can make yourself well. Your choices are very powerful and you must always be a co-partner with any health practitioner when it comes to full holistic health.


"Joy is a return to the deep harmony of body, mind and spirit that was yours at birth and can be yours again."  ~~Deepak Chopra